{"id":37,"date":"2026-05-03T08:52:55","date_gmt":"2026-05-03T08:52:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/twistyroads.net\/?page_id=37"},"modified":"2026-05-12T01:03:33","modified_gmt":"2026-05-12T01:03:33","slug":"the-road-not-taken","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/twistyroads.net\/?page_id=37","title":{"rendered":"The Road Not Taken"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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This domain formerly belonged to my grandfather, Robert Allan Wakehouse (1950-2018), who went by Bob. He was a founding member of the Twisty Roads Rally Group, which was associated with the SCCA. This page preserves some of his writings from the old website.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Bob Wakehouse and Todd Terp, in their first Fiat X1\/9, about 1\/9 mile before its spectacular conversion to an “Ex”-1\/9 during the Sports Car Club of America’s Doo-Wop semi-National Pro rally in 1994. At Twisty Roads Rally Group Headquarters<\/strong>
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Here, Bob Wakehouse stirs a bit of coffee into his cream and sugar as he explains why he’s beginning to suspect that Einstein just may have been correct after all.   Using his head, he also takes the opportunity to demonstrate the limits of photometry\u2014thereby damaging the camera flash’s sensor.
“Yeah, yeah,” Paula Terp mutters in the background.        
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[PHOTO MISSING] That’s me simultaneously pushing my luck with The Law and Nature out in the desert some place where Winslow, Arizona is the nearest town that’s been heard of by people who haven’t been there.   That storm heading toward me was enchanting: “such a fine sight to see!”
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The Road Not Taken
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Somethings are bound to show up here someday\u2014maybe today!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n



Okay, here’s some of my favorite things.   These are just what comes to mind, presented in no particular order\u2014not even in random order.

Books:

Mallworld ++ Somtow Sucharitkul
“Repent, Harlequin!” Said the Ticktockman ++ Harlan Ellison
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn ++ Mark Twain
Strawberry Spring ++ Stephen King
The Maelstrom ++ Edgar Allen Poe
Illusions – The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah   ++ Richard Bach
Red Wind ++ Raymond Chandler
(I had never read any Raymond Chandler before settling in with this short story.   I was
not expecting much.   The first paragraph stunned me.   I wish he was still alive and writing.)
Nightmare Town ++ Dashiell Hammett
(The first thing I read of Hammett.   It didn’t stun me quite like Red Wind did, but sort of.)
Fletch’s Moxie ++ Gregory Mcdonald
Fletch ++ Gregory Mcdonald
1984 ++ George Orwell

Movies:

Black Sunday (the 1960 Italian horror film)
(This one actually scared me.   During the opening scene.   A very good movie, at that!)
Raiders of The Lost Ark
The Little Shop of Horrors (the 1960 one)
Casablanca
They Live
The Deep   (I didn’t much care for the book, however.)
It Came From Outer Space
North By Northwest
The Day The Earth Stood Still
Sin City
The Graduate
Blade Runner
(I saw the latest edition last night, and liked the ending much better than the somewhat juvenile ending of the first release.)
Soylent Green
Dark Star
Porky’s
Romancing The Stone
Vanishing Point
The Parallax View
Army of Darkness
Circle of Iron
Chinatown
The Italian Job (1969)
The Stuntman
2001 A Space Odyssey
Close Encounters of the Third Kind
The Raven (Boris Karloff, Peter Lorre, and Vincent Price as warring wizards)

Television:

I Dream of Jeannie (1965 Barbara Eden, and some guy)
Gilligan’s Island (1964 Tina Louise, Dawn Wells, and some guys)
My Living Doll (1964 Julie Newmar, and some guy)
Twin Peaks (1990)
Northern Exposure (1990)
Route 66 (1960)
The Three Stooges (1950’s)
Key West (1993)
Torchwood (2007 British Science Fiction)
One Step Beyond (1960)
Doctor Who (British Science Fiction)
Bizarre (1980 Canadian Sketch Comedy)
Life On Mars (2007 British Detective in 2000’s, transported to 1970’s)
This was a miniseries, something like a half-dozen episodes.   It could have been entertaining
for a couple of full seasons, at least, but it was made as a miniseries.
Foyle’s War (2006)   British Detective in 1940’s, during the war.   Fascinating perspective.
Twilight Zone (1960)
Mystery Science Theater 3000 (1988)
Sinister Cinema (1973)   A Portland local Saturday horror film fest, with host Victor Ives.
Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-In (1968)
Alfred Hitchcock Presents (1955)
Nightmare Cafe (1992)
Secret Agent (British 1965)
The best of the rampant spy genre at the time.   John Drake (Patrick McGoohan) had more depth than the sum of the others; and the stories were believable.   (Ilya Kuryakin was kinda cool, though.)
Jericho (2006 British Detective in 1950’s)
The Sorcerer’s Apprentice   A Fantasia segment.   I saw it on TV when I was six years old.
The X-files (1993)
The Outer Limits (1963)
Davinci’s Inquest (2006 Canadian)
The Night Stalker (1974)
Peter Gunn (1958)
Nightmare Cafe (1992)
The Benny Hill Show (British Sketch Comedy)
Columbo (1970)
Strange Luck (1995)
Longstreet (1971)   I discovered Bruce Lee here.   (I didn’t watch Green Hornet.)
Dexter (2008)
I’ve seen the first two episodes.   (The first two on network TV\u2014apparently Season 3 is starting on Showtime.)   Interesting enough.   It looks like it is intended to be a standard series, meant to continue for however long enough people watch it.   This should have been conceived as a miniseries, because a guy having no emotions can’t be interesting for very long\u2014even if they tease us about ‘maybe something will happen and he’ll change’.   (I wrote all of that before finding that the show has been going on for years.   I trust I’ll eventually find out how the show has lasted this long.)
2010-01-29
Well the first two seasons kept me interested.   The third season managed to keep me going.   Seemed like I was anticipating fourth season for quite a long time.   I watched maybe fifteen minutes of it.   Haven’t seen it since.   Lost interest.   Haven’t even re-watched earlier episodes.   Don’t much know why; and not particularly curious about even that.

Favorite Planets:
Earth

Favorite Plants:

Madrona
Ponderosa
Moss

Favorite Pants:

Jeans

Favorite Places:

Nowhere.   In the middle thereof.   Clever, no?   Okay, but it is correct, nonetheless.   That’s not the only place I like, and I’m not so sure I’d like to be stranded there permanently, but it is one of my favorite places.

Underwater.   The most alien environment a human could directly experience, as far as anyone knows.   Kicking back inside a space suit to explore another planet would be better than watching CGI simulations on TV, but nothing like being completely immersed in another living world, in direct contact with it.   Sounds are different; vision is different; colors are different; feels different; movement is different; everyday physics are different; animals are different; plants are different; there are things which are alive but are not clearly plant or animal; and the vertical dimension\u2014which on land is pretty much merely observable\u2014can be interacted with, almost as freely as with the horizontal dimensions.   Many people would jump at the chance to visit another planet, but I bet they’d be disappointed: I’d rather go jump in a lake.

Behind the wheel of a decent car, at about 2:17 a.m., on a narrow and twisty road that I’ve never seen, in a place I’ve never been, far from civilization.   I’d probably award extra points for heavy rain and light or patchy fog.   I’d definitely award a lot of extra points if I don’t know where the road goes.

Favorite TV commercials series:

Corona beer
Boyd’s coffee, circa Twin Peaks
Fiat cars, in the 1970’s
Burgerville U.S.A., around 1980.   (It’s a burger chain exclusively devoted to The Northwest.)

Music:

Well, this could be a mighty long list, like anyone’s, so I’ll skip The Beatles, Bob Dylan, Fleetwood Mac, all such obvious stuff.   I’ll skip most everything else, as well.   I’ll just list a few things that some people haven’t heard of, and things I’ve recently been spending time with, and maybe some music of some particular note for some reason.

Everlast <\/em>  (The non-rap stuff, that is.   I’d never heard of the guy, but the ‘Saving Grace’ TV show theme sounded great; and then I found that a lot of other good songs come from him.   A couple of years ago I really liked some background music on a “Crossing Jordan” episode, and eventually tracked it to Santana.   I’ve been listening to it (Put Your Lights On) twice in a while ever since; and just today (to use the typical web dating system) I learned that Everlast wrote the song and was the guest singer on the Santana thing.   All of which was obvious to me, once I knew it.)

OMC <\/em>  (I liked How Bizarre <\/u><\/em>okay, but discovered that most of their stuff was much better.)
Mazzy Star <\/em>  (For the sound.)
My Morning Jacket
Eliza Carthy
Amelia
Aimee Mann
The Dandy Warhols   <\/em>Oh, but these world-famous Portland people are just so damned good!   The first The Dandy Warhols <\/em>thing I stumbled across was Solid, <\/em><\/strong>which was an amusing romp.   Then I was awed by Godless. <\/em><\/strong>  After Mohammed <\/em><\/strong>downright stunned me, I listened to every The Dandy Warhols <\/em>thing I could, and found precious little of it that I did not at least rather like.   No matter how marvelous any particular music group sounds, I do eventually get tired of them and just don’t want to hear much of them for some time.   Some take longer to make me tired, but The Dandy Warhols have held my interest far longer than any other.   I suspect they never will become tiresome.
Modest Mouse
The Shins
Dexy’s Midnight Runners   <\/em>(A side note: I’m not much fond of fiddle or banjo\u2014but one of my favorite sounds is fiddle and banjo working together.)
Cassandra Wilson   <\/em>(I rather like torch songs.)
The Paperboys
The Beautiful South   <\/em>(A doctor’s soothing voice making sympathetic wisecracks while mercilessly checking your prostate.)
Prism   <\/em>(Noisier than I   like, yet I like a lot of their stuff.)
Garbage   <\/em>(Just discovered them two days ago (in “Web Time”).)
Sonia Dada   <\/em>(Like Amelia, Sonia is not a person.)
Basia Bulat <\/em>  (Like Five For Fighting, Basia is just one person.)

Hey, Bob, are you a democrat or a republican?

No.   It is interesting that if you ask a human to choose either Thing_A or Thing_B, the human will almost certainly choose either Thing_A or Thing_B.

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Post From the SCCA Road Rally Group Forum \u2013 10\/11\/03<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’d swear we’re starting to get earnest about devising some improvement to SCCA rallying; so when I found this piece of paper stuck to the bottom of an old chest in the attic, I thought somebody here might make get something out of it. Sorry, I just found this one page\u2014I don’t know where to find a copy of the whole thing. Ebay maybe?

So here are Steps 1 through 5 from “Bob’s Guide To Effective
Troubleshooting”
Original Copyright 1962.

(But wait! If you read this within the next ten minutes, you’ll also receive a free bonus: The recently updated “Step #6”. Not available in stores. Call Now!)

\u2014 Bob “And I think I speak for everyone when I say this…” Wakehouse

****

Chapter 17: The Keys To Troubleshooting

1: Determine whether there is a problem.

Surprise! This is the most commonly overlooked troubleshooting step, yet is often the only step needed to dispose of a problem.

With respect to problems, human nature abhors a vacuum. We WILL resort to our imagination, if necessary. You wouldn’t believe how often it IS necessary.

It is common to hear, “The sky is falling!”. In short order, a lot of us will then take up the chant\u2014and the rest of us will be thinking the chanters must be on to something. Before mounting a campaign, however… look up!

It is bad form, and dangerous, to solve problems that don’t exist.

Watch your back, though: Anyone will hate you if you suggest that their pet problem doesn’t really exist.

2: Determine what is the actual problem.

Okay, let’s pretend there IS some amount of problem. The sky is still up there, however\u2014so let’s not get our hearts set on fixing THAT. It’s probably just raining, which simply calls for an umbrella.

Humans tend to suffer exaggeration addiction, which is kinda fun\u2014except when we let our tongues fall out of our cheeks.

3: What we do to solve a problem is bloody unlikely to have no effect.

Let’s hold still until we know what you’re doing. That may take forever.
That’s cool. Many of us actually believe the wisecrack, “we’ve GOT to do SOMETHING, even if it’s WRONG!” That’s not right: There is no benefit in doing wrong things.

Bonus for being patient: It is generally easier to fix something you haven’t done.

3.1: Any resolution of a problem will also induce a problem.

There’s not really such a thing as resolving a problem. About all we can do is trade problems around, like baseball cards. Let’s be sure we don’t get ourselves ripped off in a trade.

4: The best resolution of a human-related (not purely technical) problem will usually be to QUIT doing something.

This situation exists largely because most of our problems (ones that really do exist) are those that we once called “solutions to the problem”.

Although sometimes the best resolution will be to do something ELSE, it is not at all common that the best resolution will be to do something MORE.

Keep in mind the fall-back rule of thumb, “Leave bad-enough alone”.

4.1: Be wary of the experienced.

Veterans who’ve solved problems almost certainly then created or imagined new ones (else they’d have freaked out, like a horror movie victim suddenly alone in a dark, silent room). Their perspective becomes skewed.

Veterans generally don’t understand novices\u2014and they don’t understand that. Many veterans haven’t asked a question in the past twenty years (discounting the “What’s the matter with you?” category).

Experience holds no inherent merit itself (though you sure can expect it to be way better than some sort of diploma).

“You pompous young whippersnapper! I’ll have you know that I’ve been driving for forty-five years now, and I’ve put millions of miles behind me!”

“I see. Has your turn signal been on the whole time, sir?”

5: Be prepared to suck it up and live with it. You can’t always get what you want.

** Comment from this Bob:
** Some newcomers, for instance, give it a try but figure out that
** rally really is just not for them. It happens. DON’T YOU DARE
** RECONFIGURE OUR SPORT TO SUIT THEM!
** (No, I did NOT say, “Don’t change a thing.”)

######
BONUS
######

6: If intending to journey from your not-so-great place to a much more beautiful place, understand that\u2014no matter which route you take\u2014you will have to travel through the swamps of hell to get there. That’s the way it is, and that’s why most people prefer to just stay put. It will likely get quite ugly, scary, and discouraging at times. Follow your map (Jeez… well GET one, then!), and don’t let the untraveled overgrowth too readily convince you that you’ve taken a wrong turn.

Oh, and… pack accordingly.
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